Adoption

A long journey

family africa

It’s been one hectic six or seven months and to tell you the truth (in case you haven’t noticed how few posts I’ve actually done in the past couple of months) I really haven’t been focused on the design side of things in my life.   I have done little things here and there, such as help some friends and colleagues out with colour choices, cabinet choices etc. I’ve answered questions from family and friends and reply to some photo texts with a yay or a nay, but that’s the extent.  It is a little sad that design has taken a back seat to my “real life” but that’s what has happened.  Please though, don’t shed too many tears for me and the lack of design in my life, all is good.  This “real life” that I speak of has been more than amazing and to be honest I have enjoyed being focused on my family and friends for the entire summer, and now that I’m back at school, focused on my family and friends and my new position at work.  In all of this real life we have been productive though, which brings me to the here and now and the fact that for the past 11 months we (my husband and I) have been working on a BIG project.  No I’m not expecting, well at least not expecting in the traditional sense.  Here’s the scoop on our BIG project, and how it will affect the blog for the next little while.

11 months ago we decided to adopt.  Yes, adopt, and from South Africa to boot! It was a big step for us, as would have been deciding to conceive a child.  At that time late last year, we shared our decision with our family only and waited to share any details with our friends.  This was mainly in part due to the fact that with adoption there are a lot of bits and pieces and ins and outs and we weren’t really sure how to answer everyone’s questions once they started asking, and we knew that once we opened the flood gates to questions they would come.  When the flood gates were lifted, the questions that rolled in were so supportive in nature that I wasn’t sure why I hadn’t shared earlier.  Many questions were about the process, the costs and all were questions were sensitive.  Truthfully, we have only had a handful of people ask us why we chose to adopt versus birth a child and, though I personally think it is none of anyone’s business I am going to share why we chose to adopt in the hopes of educating people on adoption, and shedding light on my experience with my first-born.

In high school at an appointment with a GI specialist I was told that if I had children it would be a miracle.  I had gone 14 years with an undiagnosed autoimmune disease and this particular disease when undiagnosed could and ultimately did, build up scare tissue in your muscles and your reproductive organs.  Let’s just say our first born was a miracle and both my husband and I thank our lucky stars every day for our beautiful daughter.   Needless to say my pregnancy with that miracle baby was not all leprechauns, rainbows and pots of gold.  The commode and I became very good friends and shared a special close bond for nearly 10 months.  After an unexpected c-section, a battle with postpartum depression and the struggles that come with being a first time mother we as a couple (a strong vote on my end) decided not to birth another child, but to adopt one of the many orphaned or abandoned children that already exist in this world.  For us, the idea of growing our family in this manner just seems so natural, and it isn’t about being a great humanitarian, it’s just about being human, being globally aware and wanting to build a family albeit via a different channel  No, adoption is not the right choice for every couple or for every family, but it’s the right choice for us, and we are ecstatic.

Although it’s been 11 months and our dossier is in South Africa we don’t expect a match any time too soon.  At some point in my adoption blog journey I will get into the nitty-gritty time lines of adoption, but for now, we are happily a family in waiting.

So what does this mean for this Never Plain Jane?  The site will remain a design blog; however, I will be posting about our adoption because truth be told, adoption blogs are few and far between, and it’s a scary world to navigate by yourself.   Thank you to the subscribers who have remained faithful to the blog.  I will continue to post about design but to a lesser extent and at some point the blog may morph into a full-on adoption blog.    If you know of someone interested in international adoption have them subscribe to the blog.  I will be posting on choosing a country, the cost of adoption (financially and emotionally) and other various adoption related topics.

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